Kairos - Summer of Love

A series on relationships.

“2 wounded people don’t make a healthy relationship – it makes a hospital” – Mike Glenn, Sr. Pastor, Brentwood Baptist

[During any building process] it takes so long to see any building because it takes so long to lay the foundation. Likewise, it takes time to lay the foundation on your heart.

In the Gospel lesson comparing the houses that were built on rock and sand, the only thing that determined if the house would survive was where it was built. The building materials were the same. When a relationship fails, sometimes we think we need different building materials, but it’s probably the case of an unstable, weak foundation.

Mike said young men come to him with one request – “Mike, find me a good girl.” He says, “what good is it to bring you the girl of your dreams if the foundation [of your heart] isn’t strong enough to hold her?” It crumbles because it’s not strong enough to support, to take the weight.

Opposite of love isn’t hate, it’s apathy – “I don’t care.” Love is not tolerance. Mike’s wife doesn’t say when he gets home at the end of the day, “I’m glad you’re home because I really tolerate you.” But that’s the best the world can offer us.

No one else can bring worth and value to your life besides God. And when you take the time to cultivate that relationship, A TON of HEALING results. Spend time with God – it is in this relationship that you will find your authentic self. Jesus says, “rejoice in who I made you to be.” So often we try to fight as David in Saul’s armor – “you look good, but you can’t move, you can’t fight, and you can’t win.” David had his own unique way of defeating the giant and didn’t need to conform to the expectations of what others were telling him he should be. He didn’t need to wear armor to defeat the giant – he knew from his past that he defeated beasts with a slingshot. There’s freedom in saying, “I don’t have that gift, that responsibility.”

Some people are hard to love, they’re prickly. They’re not angry – they’re wounded. They’ve been carrying around burdens so heavy it’s a wonder [the burdens] haven’t killed them yet. The love Christ has for that person is the love He’ll give you for them.

Healthy human relationships can say to each other – “you have nothing I need.” God provides everything we need. Mike’s wife has a lot of things he wants, but God meets all his needs, so he is free to receive her love as a gift and his happiness is not dependent on her [but he still gets grumpy when he can’t spend time with her because he loves her].

I like it. Good lessons. A lot to process.