favorites from the wedding :)

a few more days til thanksgiving

Just woke up from a 4 hour nap after getting back from Orlando. It's after five and dark outside so it feels like I woke up in the middle of the night. I'm not feeling too well so I would like to go back to sleep as soon as I get the chance, and that will be soon enough. I have chapter for Tridelt, unpacking to do, a paper to finish, and Joseph and Nancy Nort said they would be checking facebook on their honeymoon to see pictures from their wedding and so Nancy can add her new last name. The wedding was AMAZING and I will try to post some pictures after I edit them (the pictures are, of course, my priority, not the paper).

Since Thanksgiving is upon us I thought this quote on what it means to be grateful sums up the spirit of this holiday:

"To be grateful is to recognize the love of God in everything God has given us and God has given us everything. Every breath we draw is a gift of God's love, every moment of existence is a gift of grace, for it brings with it immense graces from God. Gratitude therefore takes nothing for granted, is never unresponsive, is constantly awakening to new wonder and to praise the goodness of God. For the grateful person knows that God is good, not by hearsay, but by experience."
~Thomas Merton

november is NUTS

Before I made the 2 posts about law school, I realize I had not made a single post in over a week.

These last two weeks have been "crunch time" - you know, the time where everything is due at once right before the holidays.

Last weekend we had semiformal, this upcoming weekend one of my best friends (and tridelt big sister) Nancy Demetree is marrying the love of her life in Orlando Florida so I will be turning in a 7 page paper on the fourth amendment based off our class's supreme court simulation taking place this thursday (which will be my main project this week), jetting off to Florida for the rehearsal dinner and wedding festivities, returning sunday, turning in a news analysis of the presidential campaigns monday, going to murfreesboro tuesday for my brother's state championship football game (go natey!!!), then thanksgiving festivities!

thanksgiving! time at the farm! family! rest! food galore! boulevard bolt! oh yeah and some LSAT studying. but that's ok.

don't really know where november has gone, but it has been NUTS. and COLD! come back warm weather please! mmkay thanks.

so things have been going at an ultra fast past the last couple weeks and don't look like they'll be slowing down anytime soon, but that's where i'll be! can't complain - life keeps ya on your toes!

i.just.applied.to.law.school.#2

I just applied to The University of Memphis School of Law.

U-Memphis and MCSOL were two schools the Furman pre-law adviser recommended to me as good law schools relatively close to my hometown but with less stringent LSAT standards.

According to Princetonreview.com, these schools are a good "match" for me, which means I have a good probability of being accepted...but with the economy being shotty, more people are going back to school, which means a more competitive applicant pool...MCSOL said they would review my application before my second LSAT score is received, U-Memphis said they would hold it...which means not hearing back from them until January...bummer. Since I do not have much reason to believe it will improve, I wish they would go ahead and decide my fate now.

I suppose Memphis would be my first choice as of now. The pre-law adviser (and Princetonreview.com) said UT-Knoxville was a major reach school (blasted LSAT!). Though that is disappointing, I will use this time to put my whole faith and trust in God that I will end up where I need to be. The applications for two fabulous law schools are now out of my hands so I must take my hand off the altar and trust God - don't have any other choice. I mean I could worry about it and theorize my chances, but I'll do my best to choose trust, trust in God and rest in God in the midst of the uncertainty of the coming months. I got into Furman as an underdog; that could very well be the case again!

I know I just have to trust that where God closes a door he opens a window...and perhaps that I would have the wisdom to recognize said window.

i.just.applied.to.law.school.

Because of the prospect of living in Mississippi’s state capitol and being in close proximity to the major government and legal communities, I am convinced that the Mississippi College School of Law would be the ideal place to begin my legal studies. I am especially interested in the school because of the opportunities in family law. I want to specialize in family law, particularly child advocacy, and the Children’s Law Center provides the training I am seeking. I want to work with families, especially children, and offer them counsel and mediation services. I believe this career path would combine the written and verbal communication skills I have developed at Furman. It would also satisfy my desire to help others.

"Our Children's Law Center is a premier training ground, equipping students and community volunteers with the skills required to shepherd children in need of an advocate through the court system. It gives second- and third-year students the opportunity to work under faculty supervision in handling numerous adoptions and other child-related cases." -- MCSOL Website

One MCSOL admission representative told me:

"It will not hurt your chances with the admissions committee for your file to be considered with your present LSAT score.
The committee will sit down for the first time in mid to late December and consider the complete applications we have at that time. If you do not get a favorable answer with your initial file and LSAT score, then, upon your written request, your file can be considered again with your December score, if it is indeed higher. The December scores should reach us in late January, early February. We accept applications from Sept. 1 until June 1, and offer seats on a rolling admissions basis. Early application submission is ALWAYS better, so please consider getting your Application in as soon as possible."

Time to wait and see!

one tick at a time

*Karrah sent this to me It's one of the best applications of Matt 6:34 I've encountered*

Therefore we do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. - Matthew 6:34

Did you hear about the clock that had a nervous breakdown? One day it began thinking about how often it would have to tick during the coming year. Figuring two ticks a second, 120 a minute, 7,200 each hour, 172,800 a day, and 1,209,600 ticks every week, the clock suddenly realized it would have to tick nearly 63 million times during the next 12 months. The more it though about htis, the more anxious it became. Finally, the clock becam so distraught that it suffered a nervous collapse.

Confiding in a psychiatrist, the clock complained that it didn't have the strength to tick that often. The doctor responded, "But how many ticks must you tick at a time?" The clock ansered, "Only one." "Well, simply tick one tick at a time and don't worry about the next one," advised the doctor. "You'll get along fine, I'm sure." That's exactly what the clock did. And, as all good stories end, it ticked happily ever after.

Child of God, does some problem look unsolvable? Does some long-term burden appear too heavy for you to bear? Does the future appear foreboding? Cast your burden on the Lord. Ask Him to help you just for today.

As Jesus said, "Do not worry about tomorrow." Take just "one tick at a time."

When every worry, every care
To God in faith is brought,
We have no ground whereon to found
One single anxious thought.
- Anon.

One of the best things about the future is that it comes one day at a time.

love is very near

(Picture: after the tornado at the farm, the cross stands tall, offering hope)

I prayed for humility, I prayed for trust, and I know putting me in a place where the "pathway is broken and the signs are unclear" as one song says is God's way of making me cling tighter to his hand (the song continues, "and I don't know the reason why you brought me here, but just because you love me the way that you do, I'm going to walk through the valley if you want me to"). Faith is taking the first step even when you can't see the whole staircase. I can hope in God because my hope in him is secure, he has never left me in the past so why do I doubt now? If I can stand these afflictions and endure them with grace, he will be glorified in my life, I know it. I want these trials to make me stronger, not bitter, but I have been giving despair a foothold. The tasks ahead seem very daunting - finishing the term strong, retaking the LSAT, applying to law school, pleasing my parents - but God is with me, and since he is with me, and only because he is with me, I will come through it. Right? Right.

I am trying to accept the tough times I'm facing with grace and use them to trust God but I have let them really get to me and crush me. I read in my "Streams in the Desert" devotional guide the other day how "an affliction hits a believer never by chance but by God's divine direction...it is not only the grace of God but also His glory that is revealed when a believer can stand and quietly endure an affliction."

The pathway is broken
And The signs are unclear
And I don't know the reason why You brought me here
But just because You love me the way that You do
I'm gonna walk through the valley
If You want me to

Cause I'm not who I was
When I took my first step
And I'm clinging to the promise You're not through with me yet
so if all of these trials bring me closer to you
Then I will walk through the fire
If You want me to

It may not be the way I would have chosen
When you lead me through a world that's not my home
But You never said it would be easy
You only said I'd never go alone

So When the whole world turns against me
And I'm all by myself
And I can't hear You answer my cries for help
I'll remember the suffering that Your love put You through
And I walk through the darkness If You want me to

cause When I cross over Jordan, I'm gonna sing, gonna shout
Gonna look into your eyes and see you never let me down
So take me on the pathway that leads me home to you
And I will walk through the valley if you want me to

Yes, I will walk through the valley if you want me to
(Ginny Owens, "If You Want Me To")

So take me on the pathway that leads me home to you, and I will walk through the valley if you want me to. Yes, this weary pilgrim will walk through the valley on the my way to the promised land until I am home at last, free at last.

Many nights we've prayed
With no proof anyone could hear
In our hearts a hope for a song
We barely understood

Now we are not afraid
Although we know there's much to fear
We were moving mountains long
Before we knew we could

There can be miracles, when you believe
Though hope is frail, it's hard to kill
Who knows what miracles you can achieve
When you believe, somehow you will
You will when you believe

In this time of fear
When prayers so often prove in vain
Hope seems like the summer birds
Too swiftly flown away

Yet now I'm standing here
My heart's so full I can't explain
Seeking faith and speaking words
I never thought I'd say

There can be miracles, when you believe
Though hope is frail, it's hard to kill
Who knows what miracles you can achieve
When you believe, somehow you will
You will when you believe

They don't know it's often when you ask
And it's easy to give in to your fears
But when you're blinded by your pain
Can't see your way straight through the rain
a small but still, resilient voice
Says love is very near

There can be miracles
When you believe
Though hope is frail
It's hard to kill
Who knows what miracles,you can achieve
When you believe, somehow you will
somehow you will
You will when you believe
(When You Believe)

O Joy that seekest me through pain
I cannot close my heart to thee
I trace the rainbow through the rain
and feel the promise is not vain
that morn shall tearless be

christian principles in politics

(Picture: Renfro kids and Mama and Papaw Martinez at Furman)

I sat in on my grandparents' Sunday school class a month ago.

My grandpa - papaw as we call him, John Martinez - was giving the lesson. He outlined many Christian principles to consider in election year. These principles do not fall under just one of the major party's umbrella, and his lesson really convicted me and challenged me to look deeper at what, as a Christian, I am to stand for in the political realm.

Years ago Jim Wallis, author of "God's Politics: Why the Right Get It Wrong and the Left Don't Get It" came to speak at Furman and I told Papaw about this and he went out and bought the book and has read it many times. I have yet to read it but I want to. With this election, I have been challenged all over again. With God's principles, God's word, as my guide, I will continue to explore what God has to say about these matters since what I formerly believed has been shaken up a bit. It's good to be shaken up, so once things settle their foundation will surely be more secure once that foundation is God's word, if that makes any sense. Not that it wasn't God's word before, but the lens was very narrow and I want to consider the other view, the other side, which my grandfather did very well.

John Martinez gave our lesson entitled "Christians and Politics." Some of his presentation came from a sermon given by Greg Buchner in Michigan entitled "Elections, Politics, and Christianity: Hot Topics 2004." Greg says that Christians are supposed to get involved with politics(especially when God's values are at stake)!

Our Bibles tell us that God has ordained the system of civil government to protect the innocent, and to maintain proper order.

Romans 13:1-7 and 1 Peter 2:13-15 tell us that Christians are to be peaceful, law abiding citizens.

1 Timothy 2:1-3 tells us we are to pray for and honor our government leaders.

Matthew tells us to faithfully pay our taxes in chapter 22, verse 21.

Work for the highest good of all people comes in Proverbs 3:27 and Galatians 6:10.

We are told in Proverbs 29:2 that this includes working to promote Godly principles in politics and government.

The five characteristics of the Christian voter are 1)they recognize that God ordains leadership, 2)we get involved, 3)we vote, 4)we understand true
freedom, and 5)we keep the real goal in focus.

We, as Christians, are called to be good Americans, to follow and obey our government as long as what we are asked to do does not violate the laws and commandments of God.

Many of our founding fathers were not orthodox Christians yet founded this
country on religious principles. Notable among them was Thomas Jefferson
and James Madison.

In a news release from the National Council of Churches entitled "Christian
Principles in an Election Year" the following were cited:

1)War is contrary to the will of God,
2)God calls us to live in communities shaped by peace and cooperation,
3)God created us for each other, and thus our security depends on the well-being of our global neighbors,
4)God calls us to be advocates for those who are most vulnerable in our society, 5)Each human being is created in the image of God and is of infinite worth,
6)the earth belongs to God and in intrinsically good,
7)Christians have a biblical mandate to welcome strangers,
8)Those who follow Christ are called to heal the sick,
9)Because of the transforming power of God's grace, all humans are called to be in right relationship with each other,
10)Providing enriched learning environments for all God's children is a moral imperative.

WE MUST NOT BEAR FALSE WITNESS AGAINST OUR NEIGHBOR AND WE MUST LOVE OUR ENEMIES.

*Not sure why this was in bold. The Sunday school class secretary had typed out the ntoes. No explanation - just big and bold - do not bear false witness and love your enemies. Love everybody.

What does that look like? What would that look like if Christians were more intentional and resolved to love everybody? Isn't that what Jesus did? How does that translate into policy, being stewards of our resources, leadership, international and internal relations? Hmmmmmm.

shameless plug

My favorite tea.

I liked the name - "Calm" - so I gave it a try many weeks ago.

It was love.

The "Place of Peace" at Furman says it is a place to go "experience deep calmness." I can experience deep calmness with this "comforting blend of chamomile, rose petals, and soothing herbs." Mmmmmmmm.

It is good to be restored to calmness. This tea does just that.

"Tazo Calm Tea is made with pollen from Egyptian chamomile blossoms blended with fragrant lemon balm leaf from Eastern Europe. Pink rose petals from Morocco impart a light spicy taste, and a touch of natural fruit flavoring enhances the light apple-like taste of chamomile. Some people swear by it for falling asleep. Calm Tea is a soothing infusion of Blackberry leaves, Chamomile Flowers, Hibiscus Flowers, Spearmint, Lemongrass, Rose Petals, Safflowers, Peppermint, Sarsaparilla, Lemon Balm, and Licorice."

just live up to the hype. tough times lie ahead.

The race is over. Obama is President. I've emailed some of my friends who supported him asking them which of his policies they're most excited about, why they voted for him, etc etc.

I will pray for Obama and our country. He needs it; America needs it. No, I'm not going to move to Australia for now (it was a good plan, Clint, we'll see, haha). This is a great country. Tough times lie ahead. So show us this change - put it into action. Prove me wrong, Obama. You have many shady tendencies & associations. Don't make us socialist! Unite us, not create further divisions! There's always hope.

I want to see this "change" - I just pray it will be change for the good -- not all change is good. I pray our country can still hold on to the values it was founded upon and will still be a nation that encourages and rewards hard work, integrity, family values.

I am hopeful! We need your leadership Mr. Obama.

"The road ahead will be long. Our climb will be steep. We may not get there in one year or even one term, but America -- I have never been more hopeful than I am tonight that we will get there. I promise you -- we as a people will get there," Obama said in Chicago.

"While the Democratic Party has won a great victory tonight, we do so with a measure of humility and determination to heal the divides that have held back our progress," Obama said.

"To those Americans whose support I have yet to earn -- I may not have won your vote, but I hear your voices, I need your help, and I will be your president, too," he said.

He needs all our support and needs our help. He promises to be our president too.

I pray you WILL be an agent to HEAL this divide, through the grace and power of God this can be achieved and not by Obama alone. He is no messiah. But God can use this, can use him, for glory because God can do anything. Amen.

falling in love

I overheard one of my coworkers singing this today.

It's classic.
Timeless.
Heartrending.
Passionate.
Beautiful.
It speaks to the heart of the human experience of love.

Sometimes there's no rhyme or reason to who your heart decides to love. Sometimes you just can't deny it, just can't help it, just can't contain it, but before you know it, your heart feels so full with love, fuller than you ever thought possible.

My uncle said not to settle for anything less than "makes-your-heart-skip-a-beat-when-he-walks-in-the-room" love. It happened quick, but when I saw him exactly five months ago today for the first time in years my heart skipped a beat and has been skipping ever since!
"It was real, it was magic,it was calm, it was savage. It was cool as a breeze it was warm to the touch,it was never enough, it was always too much,it did all the things love does, that's how i knew it was."


"Fools Rush In" is a great movie we watched in my favorite class of college (Interpersonal Communication)and this song plays at a perfect part in the movie.

Listen to Elvis' version of Can't help falling in love here.

Wise men say only fools rush in
But I cant help falling in love with you
Shall I stay
Would it be a sin
If I cant help falling in love with you

Like a river flows surely to the sea
Darling so it goes
Some things are meant to be
Take my hand, take my whole life too
For I cant help falling in love with you

Like a river flows surely to the sea
Darling so it goes
Some things are meant to be
Take my hand, take my whole life too
For I cant help falling in love with you
For I cant help falling in love with you

meshing

I found this article on CNN.COM and found it MUCH more entertaining than the election coverage. It was kind of long, so here are the pieces I especially enjoyed.

"When looking for love, make sure their faults mesh well with yours"

It's a good and bad thing to be considered an expert in love. I don't think there's any point in pretending that you get to be an expert by meeting your soul mate early on, going through a few meaningful ups and downs, marrying in a cloud of good taste or even in a meteor shower of funk and crunk, and then dying, 50 or 60 years later, having had a faithful and fulfilling love life. We don't call those people experts. We call them lucky.

Make sure spouse has the 'right' faults

Here's the heart and the head of it: Know yourself, know the other, and face the truth about yourselves.

What 'know yourself' means

Here's what I noticed after 25 years of being a psychotherapist and 55 years of being a person: There is just about no point in complaining about another person. Not because other people aren't annoying. (My God, there are people who've been put on this earth just to make me roll my eyes and mutter disapprovingly. In my family, as a matter of fact, "other people" is the standard explanation for almost all misfortune.) But because -- especially in intimate relationships -- the complaint about Him or Her will, unfortunately and inevitably, wind its way around to You...

At first, one loves the faults because they are part of the whole adorable love package. She is a sweet and tenderhearted creature, and her inability to ask for a raise, hail a cab, or defend herself from her unpleasant mother are all part of her sweetness.

Of course, someday when you're standing in the rain with your armful of packages and ask her to flag that cab across the street and she says, winsomely, "Oh, darling, I just couldn't -- it's so ... aggressive" -- it will be less adorable.

He is determined and unswerving, which is great; he is also hardheaded and heedless. As much as you like the former, you better be comfortable with the latter as well. Understanding why is worthwhile, and usually involves a quick review of parents.

Whether or not they had a wonderful marriage you hope to emulate or a disaster you hope to avoid, it's helpful to know which parent you identified with and which parent's part you want to play. (Don't even bother trying to escape both of them entirely; to do that, you'd have to be born into another species.)

I think the biggest mistake I've seen in clients and friends and myself is acting on half an understanding: "I don't want to marry my selfish father; look how unhappy he made my sweet mother," sounds like a reasonable, even psychologically astute position, and an awful lot of people (including me) marry their nice mothers (or their nice fathers; bullies come in both genders) and think they've protected themselves. All I can say is: Not so fast, Shorty.

Consider: Marrying your sweet parent may mean that you end up playing the bully's role (someone's got to handle the rough stuff). Alternatively, marrying your dear and gentle dad may mean that you get someone with not just Dad's gentleness but his passivity, avoidance of conflict, and fear of public disapproval as well. The man who comforts you quietly after a battle with your mother is a good father -- do you have any idea what he was like as a husband?...

So know yourself and know your family. For me that means knowing that, as much as I appreciated my mother's sweetness and practical ways, I need a slightly reckless lion more than I need a sensible lamb in my life. (In the dictionary, right next to a number of hard-charging mammals -- including the weasel, famous for attacking animals larger than itself for no reason -- you will see my husband's picture.) So, finally, I married a lion, and although I never pictured myself being the person hanging on to the "oh shit" bar on the passenger side, saying, "For God's sake, honey, slow down!" I do prefer that to being the person who says, regularly, "It's okay, honey, if you're scared, we can turn around."

What 'knowing the other person' means

When you look at another person's behavior (and please, do look at what he does, not just how he explains what he does. A man with a good and different explanation for each of the five times he's stood you up is a really good...explainer. Did you want to marry a world-class explainer?), the question will arise: Is it character or circumstance? Did he do what he did because of who he is, at his core, or was he pushed to that behavior by circumstance?

Guess what? Pretty much, after 18, it's character, every time

just a little LOCA

Ok so I thought this was funny. I called the 1-800 number the tech at the Verizon store gave me. I called the number, followed the steps, which would *hopefully* lead to a quick and easy transition from my broken phone to Hailey's phone (a sweet silver razer from a very sweet young lady who was so kind to lend it to me for a month).

Turns out I needed an account password. So I called my mom. She didn't know it. She suggested some numbers. SO I tried them. They didn't work. So I called her back. I called the VZW store to ask if the passwords are assigned or if you pick them on her suggestion: if you do not pick them, they are the last four numbers to your social security number. Called mom back. She gave me the last 4 numbers to her and dad's social. I tried those numbers. They didn't work.I called the VZW store back and they gave me a new number to try. Called that number. They needed the password -- we DONT KNOW our passowrd. So I called the store back. They said to make an online account and I could change the phones online. So I made an online account. They asked for a password. We DONT KNOW the password. The VZW store said my mom would need to come into the store and change it or call the 1-800 number -- but she DOESNT KNOW the password. I called the VZW store back and told them I had gone through all these steps. This was an hour later. The lady asked what my number was, my dad and mom's name (the account holders) and said...... the password is Loca.

Loca. Our snortface pug. This whole affair made me a little loca.

Loca.

go from there

“Be kinder than you ought for everyone you meet is fighting a battle.”

I’ve heard of that quote various times, in different versions. It’s wonderful.

The little battles were rather tough today, rather frustrating. I appreciated the kindness more than ever today and tried to show it as much as possible despite my frustrations but I know I was a thundercloud at various moments and did my best to avoid human interaction during those moments if I could help it.

I remembered these quotes from Perks of Being a Wallflower:
“It’s like looking at all the students and wondering who’s had their heart broken that day, and how they are able to cope with having three quizzes and a book report on top of that. Or wondering who did the heart breaking. And wondering why.”

“So, I guess we are who we are for a lot of reasons. And maybe we’ll never know most of them. But even if we don’t have the power to choose where we come from, we can still choose where we go from there. We can still do things. And we can try to feel okay about them.”

“I think that if I ever have kids, and they are upset, I won’t tell them that people are starving in China or anything like that because it wouldn’t change the fact that they were upset. And even if somebody else has it much worse, that doesn’t really change the fact that you have what you have.”

…doesn’t really change the fact that you have what you have. What DOES change the fact that you have what you have? Time? Prayer? A God who grants the serenity to accept the things we cannot change, courage to change the things we can, and wisdom to know the difference? Yes. THAT.

Even if we don’t have the power to choose where we come from, we can still choose where we go from there. We can still do things. And we can try to feel okay about them.


We can choose where we go from there.
We can choose where we go from there.
We can choose where we go from there.

Because we're not stuck in "there" wherever "there" is, whatever "there" is doing to keep us back from moving beyond "there," getting OVER "there," and moving forward. Hmmp.